Imaginary
– (2024) – A young girl develops the same imaginary friend her new step-mother once had, and follows the same improbable motions of coping with a fantastical world. Begins as a common, lackluster family drama before gradually becoming a common, lackluster horror story. Humiliates itself when trying to explore the lore of imaginary friends, while in-turn making fools of a cast made to recite banal dialog. Lacks suspense, logic, and emotional depth.
Dark Harvest (2023)
– (2023) – Every year, teenagers must prevent a pumpkin-like creature from dominating their town. The few moments dedicated to horror are creative, atmospheric, and graphic. The bulk that’s dedicated to character drama, however, is trivial and dull. The ultimate twist is pretty obvious, but stands as one of the few ambitious plot moments.
Shakespeare’s Shitstorm
– (2020) – A boat loaded with raunchy patrons is destroyed by whales, forcing everyone onto an island where their debauchery worsens. A maniacal mess that whizzes through scenes without ever giving the story a chance to breathe. There’s too much to take in all at once, yet not all is lost. The horror aspects are imaginative and Lloyd Kaufman steals the show whenever he’s on screen. The music, however, is hardly memorable.
Easter Evil
– (2024) – A young woman believes the Easter Bunny is stalking her and, sure enough, she’s right. Of the scant 72-minutes, only about 2% of this is dedicated to horror. The rest is a banal comedy that focuses on two friends endlessly chatting in a hotel room. Simply horrendous.
Easter Bunny Massacre: The Bloody Trail
– (2022) – A group of so-called friends gather for Easter and are later picked off by someone in a rabbit costume. The story is nothing more than an IKWYDLS retread with sprinkles of Scream dialog. The murders are weak, the actors are stiff, and the pace crawls where it should be hopping. A piss-poor mark of aggravation.
your a-z guide to obscure & classic horror movies
– (1992) – A demonic desert drifter raises the attention of a wife and police. Begins as a thriller of cops pursuing a man who collects fingers, but gradually transforms into a bore where nothing seems to exist for a reason. Comprised of many versions, but none make sense.
– (1988) – Zombies are on the rise thanks to voodoo and a reading from the Book of the Dead. Doesn’t make any sense, and the same gory actions repeat themselves straight to the climax where zombies standing outside a house wait to get shot. A bore.
– (1977) – A female warden provides an unethical means of control over sexual deviants. Has nary a plot, but plenty of gratuitous violence and nudity. Not exactly bad, but never more than perverse amusement.
2001 Maniacs: Field of Screams
– (2010) – Southern lunatics seek revenge against reality show Yanks. The dialog is rotten, the acting is miserable, and the characters are detestable. Worst, though, are the atrocious attempts at racial and homosexual comedy. An annoying pile of garbage that worsens with each second.
Lake Placid vs. Anaconda
– (2015) – Various parties hunt or are hunted by a killer crocodile and snake. The horror F/X are as rotten as expected, but the low level screenplay is unforgivably miserable. Mostly gets by on girls constantly running around in bikinis.
Zombie Women of Satan
– (2009) – Circus performers fend off zombies that have nothing to do with Satan. The lone point of interest comes from cheap violence, but everything else is an embarrassment to filmmaking. Makes no sense and exhibits high levels of irritation.
From Beyond the Grave
– (1973) – Anthology of four stories that focus on a haunted mirror, a voodoo woman, a shoulder phantom and a mysterious door. Provides some amusement and creepy atmosphere, but loses too many bouts with sluggishness and silliness.
Carnival of Souls (1998)
– (1998) – Ensuing a watery car accident, a woman has premonitions of an abusive clown… who’s dead. Tries hard to come off as weird, and certainly is, but nothing straight nor uneven has any meaning or depth. Raises curiosity, but the results are always lame.
Zombie Island Massacre
– (1984) – Island vacationers are picked off one by one ensuing the resurrection of a zombie, yet all the deaths are due to a drug deal. Aside from Manfredini’s familiar score (that reminds of much better films), this is a waste of time where the highlights — kill scenes — are badly edited.