– (1978) – A dog born of evil finds his way into a happy family and makes them miserable. Every now and again something corny will occur to open eyes, but most everything else is dull and pointless. Basically worthless, but has shots that create laughter… for all the wrong reasons.
-(1979) – A married couple moves into a house that inverts crosses and spews gook. Begins with an overlong satanic ritual that paves the way for the sheer boredom that follows. There’s hardly any dialog, barely any movement, and not one inkling of suspense. For some reason ends with a voodoo ritual.
– (1981) – Killer snakes make trouble for a town that’s preparing to open a canine race track. Apparently, Satan has manifested himself into one snake that can control others, which never comes across as believable or frightening. More than a little slow, and does nothing not unseen in other serpent movies or Jaws rip-offs.
– (2006) – While searching for a five legged goat with two heads, a reporter ends up in a town inhabited by vampires, zombies, and sluts. Somewhere within the juvenile jokes and self-aware atrocities is a story with significant ambitions. Strives too hard for laughs, which is an uphill battle since the humor is abominable.
– (2000) – A man willingly becomes a monster to avenge the death of his girlfriend, then finds the deal isn’t so simple. Has a great supporting cast and ambitious F/X, but the lead is lousy and the plot too convoluted. Reminds of Spawn, another dud from hell.