Little Red Riding Hood and the Monsters

★½☆☆ – (1962) – A young girl and a skunk intend to save a wolf and an ogre from certain death. Perhaps the most traumatic children’s movie in creation, as dark creepiness, uncomfortable progressions, and nods to Satan aren’t uncommon. An absurd curiosity that’s hard to believe exists, but any joy experienced by such a travesty is ruined by repetition, aggravation, and irritation.

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Frankenweenie

★★☆☆ – (2012) – A young scientist brings his dog back to life, sparking an influx of resurrection mayhem. Has a whimsical and emotional beginning, but gradually piles on too many subplots that distract from the heart of the story. Innovative and busy, but lacks focus which ultimately harms the sentimental depths.

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Victor Frankenstein

Victor Frankenstein

★½☆☆ – (2015) – A circus freak and an eccentric scientist try to create life after death. Attempts to build intrigue with a murder investigation atop scientific activity, but neither aspect means much since the characters are wholly unlikable. Has few moments of working drama, fewer moments of amusing comedy, and even fewer moments of actual horror.

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I, Frankenstein

I, Frankenstein

★☆☆☆ – (2014) – Frankenstein’s monster, who doesn’t rot, is pursued by demons for two hundred years. A complete waste of time that hasn’t a plot to speak of, a character who isn’t cardboard, or an action scene not reliant on bombastic CGI. Enemies die laughably quick, and the prosthetic look to the villains are unintentionally corny. Abominable.

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Blackenstein

Blackenstein

★½☆☆ – (1973) – A wounded soldier undergroes transplant surgery, but a jealous doctor turns him into a monster. Takes itself seriously, which isn’t too much of a problem, but the pace crawls and the murders are purposeless. Hits a wall when entering a night club, and never gains required momentum.

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