– (2018) – Giant monsters invade Earth with aid from corporate scum, and it’s up to youth-controlled robots to bring them down. Exactly on par with the first film, from rancid dialog to slapdash action to the feeling that a lot of money was wasted during production. An obnoxious, empty headed children’s movie.
– (2018) – A team of female scientists and soldiers venture into a dimension nobody returns from. Has much to do about science terms and interdimensional mythology, but most of the occurrences come down to grand scale mumbo-jumbo. Offers a moment or two of tense violence, but this is mostly drab and soulless.
– (2018) – An alien with a knack for killing armed humans must also deal with eliminating his own species. Gets off to a vibrant, fast paced, and humorous start before running out of steam and becoming nonsensical and ho-hum. The story and editing are so sloppily handled it’s hard to tell what the overall purpose is.
– (2018) – Those who intend to end shark storms travel through time in order to save humankind. Despite the busy structure and occasional brushes with humor, the sense that this has all been seen before is overwhelming. Nothing occurs that didn’t already transpire in previous entries of this mostly awful series.
– (2018) – A paralyzed man is implanted with a device that allows him to walk and seek his wife’s killers. Starts a little slow, but hits its stride about a half hour in and rarely lets up. Filled with unexpected twists, laugh-out-loud moments, and has one whopper of a conclusion. Borders on silly at times, but lands some mean punches.
– (2016) – A group of soldiers take on the zombie armageddon with much glee and cursing. This is one of those occasions where if you don’t laugh within the first five minutes, you won’t laugh at all (unless you’re high). Constantly attempts jokes amid a common horror backdrop, but aside from a chuckle or two, nothing is funny and the bro jargon gets old fast.
– (2018) – For reasons explained in previous entries, a night is staged for people to loot and kill as they please. Not as bad as the previous sequel because this does have a pulse and doesn’t irritate as much, but it’s not about anything we haven’t already seen three miserable times before. Full of stock characters, nonsensical plotting, and lame comic relief.
– (2014) – Zombies with soft skulls force the non-infected to outlast them by any means. Has a lot going on, moves fast, and is well-made from a directorial standpoint, but the story is a common drag. Emotional and humorous situations feel forced, and nothing relevant is known of any character aside from brief flashbacks.
– (2018) – A few dinosaurs are rescued from a volcanic realm while a newly constructed breed makes trouble in a facility. Peaks 30-minutes in after an exciting lava chase, but the rest is a contest in which means less: the stale plot or the stale characters. Has some dark moments, but when the only sympathy is geared toward CGI monsters, something is seriously wrong.
– (2013) – Jewelry store robbers, one of their young sons, and a cab driver end up the targets of witches who plan mankind’s fall. Begins as a humorous heist film with no traces of horror, but waiting for the witch scenario to take flight is worth the effort. Eventually does whatever it wants to do to provide shocks and humor, and ultimately stands out as a mark of pure lunacy.