Detention

★½☆☆ – (2011) – An active serial killer prompts students of 2012 to travel to 1992 to stop an explosion. Piles on a billion jokes that deal with modern/past awareness, past coolness, and time travel, but none are especially funny since they’re on a haphazard path toward nothingness. A complete mess that tries too hard to amuse.

8 total views, no views today

Chopping Mall

★★★☆ – (1986) – Shopping mall security robots go on a rampage during an overnight party. A metallic ’80s slasher that offers plenty of violence and nudity. Tends to drag toward the end, but is still a fun ride with solid low budget action.

13 total views, no views today

The Final Destination

★★☆☆ – (2009) – People who avoid a brutal collision at a race track are picked off by death itself. The overall premise and talk of death’s design haven’t changed one iota, which gets wearisome fast. The gore quotient is deliriously stupid, and there’s some amusement within the unintended humor.

13 total views, no views today

Dawn of the Dead (2004)

★★☆☆ – (2004) – Zombies force a bunch of plague survivors to take refuge in a shopping mall. Outside of the setting, this has nothing to do with the original. The prior fantasy is sucked out by whining characters who have zero chemistry together. Has a high quotient of undead mayhem, but fun is non-existent.

13 total views, no views today

Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama

★★★☆ – (1988) – A college initiation prank leads a group of students to a mall to steal a bowling trophy that unexpectedly houses a wish granting imp. Horrible acting and dialog suggest a miserable time, but a variety of cheap ideas, and a boatload of cheaper nudity, make this a perfect guilty pleasure. A time capsule of ’80s cheese.

14 total views, no views today

Hide and Go Shriek

★☆☆☆ – (1988) – Friends play hide and seek in a shopping mall while sleeping with each other and getting stalked by someone who steals their clothes. One death scene works, and there’s nudity, but nothing else is commendable. The characters are lame, the actors are bad, and the killer’s a joke.

11 total views, no views today