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Thanksgiving

★★★☆ – (2023) – Someone is picking off those in connection with a Black Friday tragedy. Works well as a throwback to 80’s slashers, complete with annoying teens amid a whodunnit backdrop. This is basically My Bloody Valentine meets Happy Birthday to Me, which is perfectly fine. The pace is relatively brisk, some of the kills are hysterical, and the outcome is mostly satisfying.

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Hell House LLC Origins: The Carmichael Manor

★☆☆☆ – (2023) – A small group of ghost hunters investigate a mansion with a checkered past. Begins with promise when setting up what should be a spooky situation, but once the back story is out of the way the real troubles start creeping in. For one, the structure is repetitive. Nothing happens until BAM! a ghost appears. Rinse and repeat. Worse are the actors/characters. Rarely is a cast as screechy, whiney and hard to root for.

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Five Nights at Freddy’s

★☆☆☆ – (2023) – To prove he’s capable of taking care of his younger sister, a man takes on a job at an abandoned restaurant. Unfortunately, his sibling befriends the animatronics within while others aim to destroy the property. An insufferable dud that focuses on the trivial plights of unrelatable characters while the main attractions waste more time building a fort than actually terrorizing anyone. There’s supposedly “lore” to understand, but I’d rather not further explore these mechanisms of outright boredom.

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Suitable Flesh

★½☆☆ – (2023) – A psychiatrist gets involved with a patient who’s succumbing to an evil entity that has the ability to alter bodies. Though the premise is intriguing, the output is bogged down by less-than-stellar performances and an overly pretentious villain. The brushes with gore are decent, but in all there’s simply no one to care for since anyone could be anyone else at any given moment.

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Totally Killer

★½☆☆ – (2023) – A young woman from 2023 travels back to 1987 and attempts to thwart an infamous massacre. Might have felt more original if not for 2015’s The Final Girls, but still has plenty of problems to call its own. The decade references aren’t always authentic, the time travel motif is too ridiculous to take seriously, while the characters are basically props in ’80s costumes. Does have a few clever moments, but its own wit comes across as smarmy.

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