– (2015) – A man who hears voices attempts to kill the daughter of an artist who’s hearing the same voices. Has a relatively strong family dynamic, and a frustratingly cruel villain, but too much happens too fast to become emotional attached to either. Gets under your skin at times, but misses the mark in others.
– (2016) – A toy monkey from the Amityville house has a man envisioning the ghost of the notorious Long Island killer. At the very least has something to do with the original film, unlike most recent sequels, but the output is too cheap to respect. Does have murders that correlate with the legend, but there’s virtually no conclusion. Runs less than an hour before the slow credits roll, which is the ultimate blessing.
– (2016) – The survivor of the previous entry watches a movie with her mother and recounts past footage to a shrink. One of the laziest, ugliest, and least resourceful heaps of dung to ever disgrace an internet stream. Built on scenes from other lousy movies, while anything new is preposterously inept.
– (2016) – A group of friends visit the site of past murders and are stalked by a killer in a clown mask. How bad is this? Let’s count the ways. 1. There are too many stagnant shots of random things. 2. The acting stinks. 3. The story and its flashbacks make no sense. 4. Has an open ending as though anyone would want this garbage to continue.
– (2005) – A reality show is filmed on the grounds where the previous entries took place and, sure enough, someone in a clown mask is picking everyone off. Attempts something unique (for the time), but still succumbs to the same low-budget trappings that destroys its independent credibility. A humorless, goreless, careless waste of time.
– (2000) – A film crew intends to make a movie based on real camp murders, and bring along the only survivor, but find someone else picking them off. As far as zero-budget backyard sequels go, this isn’t the worst, but the story and character angles are missing. Has moments of brutality, but it’s too cheap and drab to consider a success.
– (2016) – A creature is picking off dimwits who f**k on its killing ground. Essentially has no f**king plot, as this is merely a means to have lousy f**king actors have partially clothed sex. Good for some okay f**king nudity, but anyone looking for solid f**king entertainment need steer f**king clear.