Evil Dead Burn
– (2026) – A young widow visits the family of her deceased husband only to discover their dysfunction has ties to demonic possession. Mainly gets by on violence and some neat camerawork, since there isn’t a single character worth cheering for. This is by far the lesser entry in the series mainly because the participants are just as despicable as humans as they are as deadites. Every moment is so dour and humorless that the weight of the depression gets tiresome fast, which ultimately leads to empty mayhem.
Ice Cream Man (2026)
– (2026) – Kids who eat ice cream from the same vendor become possessed killers who slaughter every adult that nears them. A giddy show of violence that spills blood, intestines and puke all over the screen. It’s fun as such, and the teen/pre-teen actors aren’t bad, but the backstory, and only point of drama, is pretty lackluster. In all this is a goofy good time that’s short and moves fast.
The Last Amityville Movie
– (2023) – A man who receives a doorknob from a haunted house starts experiencing minor haunts. Acknowledges the vast amount of Amityville movies before becoming one, but the premise isn’t as clever as intended since it never provides finality as to why these movies exist nor why they absolutely should end. It’s just another cruddy Amityville movie with a misleading title.
Once Upon a Time in Amityville
– (2024) – Bounty hunters seek a refuge in a haunted town. It’s hard to fathom how a film that only runs 71-minutes can cause such monumental grief. The main reason this equates torture is largely due to languidness. The diminutive cast does little but meander from one scene to the next while occasionally coming across a cheap effect. There’s simply no life to the proceedings, as though the digital imprint itself is dead.
Funeral
– (2025) – A small group of people gather for a closed casket funeral during a snow storm, then find they can’t escape the parlor. While this does touch on themes of youth, old age, death and commitment to country, there’s never a sense of exactly what’s happening or why. When the end results are rendered? Good luck not groaning with disapproval. Probes the meaning of life, but does so through a haphazard screenplay.
Amityverse: Infinity
– (2026) – Anthology of 10 stories that focus on a suicide, a radio, singing ghosts, a devious shrink, shark-crabs, a shitting spirit, a cult leader, a dentist, a killer director, and hand puppets. While each story is so short we’re quickly put out of our misery, they’re still a trial to sit through. Every segment is cheaper than dirt, and range from mostly bad to impossibly irritating. Might have been fun for those who created this hell, but the rest of us are made to suffer.
– (2012) – Petty thugs break into a house filled with recordings of a sex demon, a murderous lesbian, a killer ghost, a spirit manipulator, and a haunted house. Each segment focuses on tired plots that somehow provide a fair share of surprising moments. The erratic style is irritating, and the acting is baneful, but the experience as a whole isn’t all bad.
– (2012) – A serial killer who collects heads takes a liking to a formidable enemy. Draws many similarities to The Silence of the Lambs, and quickly bites the dust in doing so. Unimaginative, predictable, and lined with unabashedly awful CGI gore.
– (2013) – A man with a keen ability to find the truth in others tries solving the murder of his first and only love. Speaks volumes for the pain of losing a reason to live to those deemed trustworthy, but the supernatural impact grandually gives way to common corn. Sadly, the fantastic drama becomes too familiar.
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2003)
– (2003) – Five friends on their way to Dallas befall a cannibalistic clan of killers. Sticks to the original’s basic formula, but can’t match the importance since the heroes are bland fashion models while the villains try too hard to agitate. Has graphic horror elements, but the ’70s atmosphere is non-existent and the conclusion is resentful.
Winnie-the-Pooh: Blood and Honey II
– (2024) – Animals once abandoned by a human continue their destructive ways. There’s really not plot to speak of, as the only story relates to the occurrences of the first film, but I doubt anyone will show up for the narrative. Those coming for the violence certainly won’t be let down, as the murders deliver some truly heavy punches. Thin but brutal.
Violent Shit III (aka Zombie Doom)
– (1999) – Karl the Butcher Jr. now resides on an island with an infantry that’s trained to annihilate. The first of the series to flow like an actual movie, but the dialog/dubbing is insanely pitiful and the acting leaves much to be desired. The main objective is violence, and there are plenty of disgusting atrocities to go around.
The Skeleton Key (2005)
– (2005) – A woman is hired to care for an elderly man in a house of hoodoo secrets. Some parts of the mystery are intriguing, and the conclusion is bizarre, but the overall pace makes every second feel like an hour. Best when dealing with atmosphere, since the character stories leave much to be desired.
Killjoy’s Psycho Circus
– (2016) – After escaping Hell, a devious clown hosts a talk show before realizing he should leave Earth. Has so much going on that any accurate description might take pages, yet the maniacal structure is the saving grace. Incredibly ambitious for something shot on the cheap, and has aspirations to please fans of pure lunacy.
There’s Nothing Out There
– (1990) – Friends vacationing in a wooded house during Spring Break encounter a killer alien, much to the chagrin of a horror movie fan who’s seen all this before. A fast paced and highly ambitious outing that dusts most other low-low-low budget outings by featuring genuine humor and necessary horror elements, notably nudity & death. Pre-dates Scream’s gimmick of self-awareness by five years, and decades later still feels fresher. Rolfe Kanefsky was certainly on to something.