An Amityville Poltergeist
– (2020) – Some guy with a lousy moustache housesits a notoriously haunted domicile. The attempted horror is far less scary than the attempted drama, since that area is piled high with a nightmarish amount of clichés. The title is misleading, as are most films that use “Amityville” as a means to promote garbage that would otherwise never see the light of day.
141 total views, 30 views today
Amityville Vampire
– (2021) – A mismatched couple on a car trip recount the tale of vampires who once frequented the area. The flashback scenes, though ordinary, do set a dark mood while spilling blood, but time spent with the modern day duo is close to torture. There’s also a segment involving rapist campers for some reason. All told? Some of this is okay, but most is rancid.
480 total views, 24 views today
The Amityville Moon
– (2021) – A werewolf is attacking troubled girls in and around the church that houses them. Aside from a street sign on the Long Island Expressway, this has nothing to do with Amityville. It’s simply standard lycanthrope fare no matter the location. Some cheap gore highlights the boredom, and drama angles are attempted, but in the end this is nowhere near as emotional as it thinks it is.
680 total views, 28 views today
Amityville Cult
– (2021) – A man inherits a house in a town called Amityville, though it’s not the same house or town you’re thinking about. Has a ton of talk about a lame backstory involving a coven, but not much in the way of actual horror. A drab drama with unrealistic dialog and high school theater acting that worsens as it goes. When the horror aspects do eventually arrive, they’re rather awful.
755 total views, 23 views today
Amityville Cop
– (2021) – A possessed and deceased cop makes trouble for a small police force on New Year’s Eve. While this does show mercy by only lasting 68-minutes, that hour is jam packed with nothing special. Murders are too infrequent, the comic relief is terrible, and there’s nothing “Amityville” about it.
892 total views, 35 views today
your a-z guide to obscure & classic horror movies
– (2007) – A schoolboy tracks down and kills the soldiers who ate his little sister. A big budget is all that masks how typical and foolish the overall plot is. Does little to expand the lore of a great villain, who was better off left unexplored.
707 total views, 1 views today
– (2013) – A nurse is hired to care for a comatose patient who has psychic ties to the outside world. An idea that barely worked the first time around is brought to the digital age with little results. Characters are weak and their motives fare worse.
702 total views, 1 views today
– (2014) – An aspiring actress sinks low to earn a role, then somehow transforms into a vicious killer. The intention is to perhaps ward off dreams of fame, but the conclusion renders that theory void as nothing is gained by any violent event. The bloodshed is unnerving at times, but the drama and social points are lost.
764 total views, 3 views today
Wrong Turn 5: Bloodlines
– (2012) – A group of friends fall prey to mutants who have legendary ties to their small town’s murderous past. The violence is inventive and sometimes disturbing, but that’s all this has going for it. The logic, acting, and dialog are insultingly hideous.
908 total views, 3 views today
Primeval
– (2007) – Americans research a giant crocodile in genocide laden Africa. The drama and terror most often work well, but occasionally fall victim to silliness. Gets better as it goes and has a pretty effective conclusion.
896 total views, 5 views today
Outpost: Rise of the Spetsnaz
– (2013) – Russian soldiers held captive by Germans discover experiments that turn people into super zombies. Does what it can to provide moments of action and horror, and does so in limited time. Why this bland series insists on continuing, however, is beyond comprehension.
768 total views, 2 views today
I Walked with a Zombie
– (1943) – A nurse is hired to care for a catatonic woman on an island of rampant voodoo. The atmosphere and ritual inclusions hold attention, but the pace makes an hour feel like a day. Lacks suspense and a substantial purpose.
1,157 total views, 6 views today
Clownhouse
– (1989) – Three brothers are stalked by lunatic clowns while their parents are out. Has an okay concept that’s nearly destroyed by piss poor acting and a lagging pace. Provides clues to the behind-the-scenes controversy, but none affect how sour the story is.
1,007 total views, 2 views today
Teenape vs. the Monster Nazi Apocalypse
– (2012) – A band of ragtag warriors take on the resurrection of Hitler and those who’ve summoned him. Has a lot going on at a brisk pace, but never slows enough to establish a full purpose. Not as raunchy or non-PC as past Teenape adventures, but provides some of the humor you’d come to expect.
894 total views, 5 views today