Sinners
– (2025) – Twin brothers buy property with stolen money and turn a sawmill into an entertainment venue, but local vampires gradually intervene. Racial undertones notwithstanding, 99% of what’s here has been seen plenty of times before. Character drama is sidelined for the same old monster scenarios already presented in The Howling and From Dusk Till Dawn, among others. Lack of uniqueness is one thing, but what sinks this is how painfully dull it is.
Crimes of the Future (2022)
– (2022) – In a world where humans feel no pain due to evolving organs, surgical procedures are enacted for potential entertainment. Not the easiest to describe, and certainly not an easy watch, but this has a strange, hypnotic quality that manages to maintain frequent attention. The production is top of the line, and the cast is eager, but this often seems odd for the sake of odd.
Crimes of the Future (1970)
– (1970) – In a world where women were killed off by makeup products, a man gradually develops a foot fetish. There’s a little more to this than one brief description, but not much. The slim plot moves at a snail’s pace, while the only sense of narration is told through a whispered voice over. Granted, it’s an experimental film, but even the most theoretical movies deserve a pulse.
Final Destination: Bloodlines
– (2025) – A family that should never have existed is picked off by death itself after their matriarch is killed. Does everything you’d expect from this series, from creative deaths to expository dialog, but does so in a rather upbeat way. This could be the funniest entry, as it rarely takes itself too seriously while piling on one ridiculous kill after another (usually involving sudden head trauma).
Girl House
– (2014) – A young woman moves into a manor where girls are willingly filmed (and sometimes killed) around the clock. Begins with the promise of plentiful smut and gore, but each aspect is mostly held in check throughout. Even though suspense is also lacking, this is a wholly watchable film with solid production values and better-than-average acting.
Street Trash (2024)
– (2024) – A few homeless people aim to stop a corporation from killing off bums with an experimental drink. While the practical F/X are nice and disgusting, they all involve characters who never amount to much, whether on the side of good or evil. There’s an awful lot of screaming throughout, leading to an obnoxious experience that all the goo in the world can’t save.
your a-z guide to obscure & classic horror movies
– (2008) – A college student investigates a potential boogeyman who’s offing coeds. Has a couple of okay moments, but is too standard overall and never accomplishes anything original. A stale end to a bland series.
– (2022) – A group of friends partake in a game where they either become temporarily or permanently possessed. The plot is less than intriguing, the characters are less than engaging, and the fear factor is less than zero. A sluggish bore that crawls through basic advancements with players that are nearly impossible to root for. Features shades of It Follows, but contains none of its suspense.
– (2003) – A man with knowledge of underwater diamonds is heavily persuaded by the Russian mob to give up their whereabouts. Begins as a terrible-but-enjoyable bloodbath, but gradually becomes a lame crime caper. Endlessly boneheaded.
Lost After Dark
– (2015) – A group of friends steal a bus, run out of gas, and end up in the terrain of a killer. Another faux ’80s slasher that pretends it’s from the past but forgets to include a single moment that feels like the ’80s. This is just another shot on digital mess with CGI gore and typically trite teens.
Shakma
– (1990) – A pissed off baboon decimates med-school students as they play a game in their college. Any chance of feeling for the main characters is lost since they’re killed so early on, while the link between the angry monkey and his owner means nothing as emotions are never provided. A long trip to nowhere.
Outpost (2007)
– (2007) – Soldiers uncover secret experiments that bring Nazis back to life. Utilizes a few inventive ideas, and occasionally becomes violent, but every character is too typical to mean anything. Well made, but the script is the pits.
Shrunken Heads
– (1994) – Three murdered teens have their heads shrunken by a local voodoo priest and seek revenge on the gang that killed them. Calling this weird would be an understatement. Calling this good would be a lie. Goofy, but so absurd and morbid that it’s hard to look away from, despite lame villains and a horrendous love story.
Camp Blood First Slaughter
– (2014) – Students enter the domain of a notorious killer only to become the target of another murderer. Has moments that resemble an actual movie, but most of this is shoddily constructed. The F/X are particularly bad, but at the very least a credible body count is attempted.
Unspeakable (2000)
– (2000) – A man who’s tormented by his daughter’s death kills hookers to ease his pain. Showcases some revolting horror, and has no problem exploiting an ugly world, but the horrid acting and dialog ruin all emotional attachments.