Killstreak
– (2025) – Video game streamers discover that if they die in the game they also die in real life. Takes a concept that’s been done several times before yet somehow makes it dumber. That stupidity, however, is the only aspect keeping this afloat. The dimwitted characters are unappealing, while their plights are ludicrously over the top, but watching them worm their way through reproduced drivel is mildly entertaining.
The Housemaid
– (2025) – A woman is hired to oversee house duties for an affluent couple and their bratty kid, but she soon realizes that nothing in their lives keeps up with appearances. Though overlong and ultimately stretched thin, the story has enough wild advancements and twists to constantly hold attention. Nevertheless, many “suspenseful” moments are hard to take seriously thanks to a high abundance of overacting and/or underacting from everyone involved. Laughable in all the right and wrong places, but admittedly fun.
Mother of Flies
– (2025) – A father takes his cancer-stricken daughter to a witch for a hopeful cure, but instead finds trickery of the herbal kind. While some images are stark, and the scenery creates a mood of isolation, the experience as a whole is bogged down by two miserable factors: dialog and acting. Every line uttered feels unnatural, while every mannerism feels stiff. It’s hard to root against a commendable intention, but the output is suffocated by listlessness.
Whistle
– (2025) – Teens who blow into an Aztec device are thereby hunted by the dead versions of their future selves. Has a great concept that can’t help but gravitate toward “borrowing” from other films, as the premise ultimately morphs into an It Follows and/or Final Destination clone. The plot isn’t airtight either, and cliches are abundant, but this is still fun when delivering the gory (CGI) goods.
The Strangers: Chapter 3
– (2026) – A young woman is held hostage by masked invaders and is forced to kill alongside them, making escape her only true option. Attempts intrigue with a plot that covers the past and present, but one resounding question keeps surfacing: who cares? The brief moments of violence are decent, but this wades through nothing while assuming the plot means something.
10/31 Part IV
– (2024) – Anthology of four stories that focus on a killer who escapes from a movie, revenge on a poisoner, a witch house, and a werewolf. Everything about this is merely okay. There’s nothing great about the stories, the acting, nor the F/X, but they all overshine the vastly unappealing digital look. Each story moves somewhat fast, so this won’t bog down and kill your entire evening.
– (1996) – A bridge constructionist oversees the erection of a new passage in an African village that’s littered with lions. Attempts a Jaws-on-land motif, but the suspense fails, the jokes fall flat, and the characters are all stiff. Means well, but goes nowhere.
– (1978) – Desolate, vegetarian lesbians take in a meat eating male who’s been possessed by an alien. Spends most of the time with only three characters, but they’re engaging enough to keep the plot rolling. Takes some ridiculous turns, and doesn’t mean much in the end, but it’s still a pretty good time.
– (1943) – A nurse is hired to care for a catatonic woman on an island of rampant voodoo. The atmosphere and ritual inclusions hold attention, but the pace makes an hour feel like a day. Lacks suspense and a substantial purpose.
The Devil’s Rejects
– (2005) – A depraved family wreaks havoc on innocent civilains while a disturbed cop tracks them down. Follows a different path than its predecessor, House of 1000 Corpses, and as such is much more focused and absorbing. The violence is brutal, yet the despicable “bad guys” are hard to root against. A dynamic study of humanity’s darkest roots.
Spring Break Shark Attack
– (2005) – Teens on vacation encounter a swarm of killer sharks. The horror plays second fiddle to pubescent dramatics, but the situations are never outright bad. Could have used more bite, but is easily digestible.
Undead
– (2003) – When a horde of zombies attack, a group of survivors fight back. Only offers something unique at the climax, as everything else has been seen in nearly every other zombie movie. Crawls, but sports some okay violence.
White Zombie
– (1932) – A couple travels to Haiti to become married, but an owner of undead slaves wants the woman for himself. Aside from expectedly lame dialog and unfortunate racism, this is a pretty creepy story that’s far ahead of its time. Dark, moody, and mostly effective.
Slasher House
– (2012) – A woman awakens in a guard-free prison where serial killers compete to kill her. The concept isn’t bad, but everything that brings it to life is staggeringly self-absorbed. Riddled with pretentiousness from the dialog straight through to the overmuch mannerisms of the actors. Putrid.
The Butchers
– (1973) – Deli workers are supposedly offering meat from humans. A moment or two occurs between butchers and consumers, but none make sense of whatever the hell this is about. A meaningless wreck that lacks a single positive event.