Cube Zero

★½☆☆ – (2004) – A small group of strangers struggle to escape from a series of boxes while engineers try to keep them contained. Only distinct from the previous entries in that we leave confined compounds, but the scenes outside the squares are equally inept. Has a great opening shot of grue, but all else is stale and uneventful.

 124 total views

Jacob’s Ladder (2019)

★½☆☆ – (2019) – A war vet’s life is upended when his thought-dead brother returns, amid other non-explainable moments. Takes the basic idea of the first film and, for reasons unknown, actually does less from a horror standpoint. The drama is nothing to brag about, either, since every advancement is dry and corny.

 158 total views

Cupid

★½☆☆ – (2020) – A bullied teen makes a deal with a Greek myth to obliterate her wrongdoers. Opens eyes during moments of gore, but this is mostly dragged down by typical teenage shenanigans of the annoying variety. Piled high with horror devices that have been unoriginal for decades, and the look of the killer is cheap.

 211 total views,  1 views today

Countdown

★★☆☆ – (2019) – A phone app that can predict when you’ll die causes trouble for those who will die soon. Has a lot going on regarding horror and drama, but not much gels since the blending of events is often muddled and unfocused. There’s no tension, the comic relief stinks, and not much is original, but it’s easy to sit through since annoyances are few.

 327 total views,  1 views today

Terror Toons 3

★☆☆☆ – (2015) – The villains from Part 1 are resurrected, then are largely forgotten about while H.G. Lewis narrates fairy tales. The plot is so disjointed it’s often impossible to tell what’s happening. An unsightly mess with some of the worst F/X ever committed to celluloid. Dung.

 136 total views

Terror Toons 2

★½☆☆ – (2007) – Monstrous puppets of Hansel & Gretel invade a young girl’s birthday party. The persistent aim for cartoon camp only reaches levels of over-the-top irritation, even before the monsters are unleashed. The F/X are terrible, the plot is flimsy, and the strive for comedy never succeeds. Follows the basic pattern of the original, which is not a good thing.

 142 total views

Terror Toons

★☆☆☆ – (2002) – A small party is invaded by diabolical puppets of Satan. Strives for a campy edge by staging itself as a live action cartoon, but nothing is remotely funny nor engaging on any level. Characters are types, while the obnoxious villains wear out nerves in a hurry.

 142 total views

Zombieland: Double Tap

★★☆☆ – (2019) – Survivors of a zombie outbreak go in search of one of their own in dangerous terrain. Does what it can to entertain in a variety of ways, but nothing is particularly original or as funny as intended. Comes and goes without causing irritation, but once it’s over it’s easy to move on from.

 129 total views

Dr. Sleepless

½☆☆☆ – (2020) – A group of students and their adulterous professor go camping at a site where an author went missing. An absolute travesty of film making from shoddy script to slapdash editing. Nothing makes any sense, and for some reason “The Raven” is narrated throughout. An ugly, erratic, and tedious waste of time.

 249 total views